No words . . .

In April, Shiro Obata (the minister of Haruna Church of Christ), Joel and I traveled to Sendai to visit with some church members there and assess where we might be able to work and how we might be able to partner with other Christian workers in Miyagi prefecture to help in the relief efforts. That was over two months ago and I still struggle to find words to express what my heart felt there. I can tell you that I saw cars flipped and leaned up against houses or floating in swimming pools, houses turned on their sides or missing everything from the first floor except the beams that were still holding up the second floor and, closer to the ocean, one loan house still standing in the midst of dozens of empty foundations. I can say that, but there are no words to describe how it feels to realize that those things are all evidence of lives left devastated.

But God led us to work, and by the prayers and generosity of brothers and sisters all over the world, we are doing what we can to bring relief to the people of Ishinomaki (a city a little north of Sendai that was badly damaged by the tsunami) in partnership with the Be One network of churches and with workers from Asian Access.

At the beginning of May, a group of 13 volunteers traveled to Miyagi prefecture to volunteer in Ishinomaki over 10 days. We stayed at Sendai church and we were able to meet with and encourage several of our friends in Sendai. Most of the team traveled to Ishinomaki (about a 1.5 hour drive north of Sendai) every day (except Sunday) to distribute food and other goods, clean up debris and put on BBQs for the people of Ishinomaki. I stayed behind in Sendai to cook for the team, do shopping and laundry. It was a lot of work and a lot of long days for everyone, but our team was able to do a lot of good work and bring glory to our Father.

The funds that came to the churches of Christ in Japan are being held by Mito church, because we are centrally located and a strong enough church to handle that responsibility. However, the funds are being managed and distributed to the volunteers by the Church of Christ East Japan Disaster Relief Committee, a committee of 10 members from 8 churches -- I was humbled to be chosen as one of the representatives of Mito church on that committee. I am one of two who are managing the relief account, incoming donations and other financial records. Please pray for me as I try to serve God in that role and learn as we go along.

The committee has chosen three young adults, who live in Mito, to work part-time with the relief efforts, under Joel's supervision, for the next year. It has been a blessing to begin working with Emiko, Gaku and Hiro and to watch as they grow into their roles and their relationships. I am so thankful for their service and the opportunity to work with them in serving God and bringing love and relief to the people of Ishinomaki.

Since the beginning of June, Joel, Gaku and Hiro have been going up to Ishinomaki every week from Sunday night to Wednesday to work and build relationships. With help from a couple of people here in Mito, I have been preparing the food that they need for their breakfasts and lunches to take with them. It helps to keep the cost down and makes sure that they are eating very healthy meals while they are working their little tails off.

I was able to join them last week. It had been about three weeks since the last time I went to Ishinomaki. And this time was different somehow. I was physically tired, which is normal -- we worked hard. But this time I also felt even more emotionally and spiritually tired. I think that it may be because this time I could see more of the long term needs of the people. Of course, there is still so much cleaning to be done, and there are still lots of people who need food and other things like that, but there is so much hurting -- people who will need help rebuilding their lives from the heart up, people whose lives were broken before the tsunami came, and people who need someone to love them through their loss, someone to teach them how to grieve, someone to work beside them as they pick up the pieces and start again. And when I think about their faces and their hearts, my heart feels broken, and I feel small and helpless, and the truth is that I am tired. But I know that God is calling us to this task. I know that he will equip us and refresh us. And I know that through him, we can bring hope and healing.

So please keep praying for Japan. We need your prayers.

Joel, Hiro and I will be going up to Sendai and Ishinomaki from July 10th until the 22nd. Gaku and Emiko and several other volunteers from Mito and the Tokyo area will be coming in and out during that time. Please cover this work with your prayers.

A Lot of Boys & a Lonely Toothbrush

At the end of April Joel, Gaku and I got a new roommate. Hiro moved into our house, just as the craziness of the relief work began with a 10 day trip at the beginning of May. So the guest room upstairs became Hiro's room, and I now share a house with 3 boys. By God's grace, they are all very nice boys, who are kind, considerate and understanding. And I am very thankful for our "family".

Hiro, Me, Joel and Gaku

As with any group, when you add a new member the dynamic changes a little or a lot. And our home has seen a few changes, a fair amount of stress and now we have welcomed a new member all in the past few months. I think that after the earthquake, I especially felt most safe, most comforted in the times that I could spend with Joel and Gaku. I feel that God has worked through our friendships to make us strong enough to face the work that he has called us to do. And in the midst of that, we have accepted Hiro into our home and in trying to make him feel that he is part of our family, I think we have all been drawn closer together. I am so thankful for the place of grace and love that God has created for all four of us.

I believe that God gifts us with the chance to be in community -- through that he gives us encouragement, protection and strength in numbers to stand up to the attacks of Satan and a place where we can grow together in our faith and our work for God. Please pray we me that God will continue to make our home a place of light, a place of love and a place that is a sanctuary dedicated to him -- I know that in our human brokenness we are all sometimes vulnerable to temptations of all kinds, so my prayer is that our house will continue to be full of purity, love and joy.

Just a few weeks after Hiro moved in with us, the Church of Christ East Japan Disaster Relief Committee decided to hire Gaku, Hiro and Emiko (a young woman, who is a member of Mito church) to work with Joel in leading and organizing the relief efforts in Ishinomaki. From the beginning of June, the boys have been going up to Ishinomaki every week from Sunday night until Wednesday. So for a few nights every week, my toothbrush is all alone next to the sink and I spend too much time wondering if the boys are working too hard and not sleeping enough.

But, as usual, God has provided for my weakness, for my loneliness and even for the times when I struggle to release my concern for the safety of Joel, Gaku and Hiro to him. He has blessed me with growing friendships with Emiko (who will actually start going up to Ishinomaki with the boys when her other part time job is finished in about a month) and her sister, Noriyo. They check in on me and we have girl time when the boys are out of town, and even when they are in town. It has been so fulfilling to build relationships of mutual growth and encouragement. I feel like God has given me a chance to be in the role of mentor at times, but I am also so encouraged and challenged to grow in my faith because of my friendships with Noriyo, Emiko and their parents, as well.

Emiko and Noriyo

Emiko, Me, Kristen and Noriyo

My Hometown is God's Kingdom

As many of you know, my dad was in the military, so I am basically without a hometown. This sense of having no place where I have planted roots has sometimes left me feeling displaced and even lonely, but since I have found Christ, I have a place to plant my roots. I am moved by the passage in Hebrews 11. Paul is talking about all the people who lived by faith in God's promises -- verses 15 and 16 say "If they had been thinking of the country they had left, they would have had opportunity to return. Instead, they were longing for a better country -- a heavenly one." In the chaos and grief and busy-ness and bad things and good things that have ensued since the earthquake, I have been moved by this idea -- our hometown is God's Kingdom, and we must live our lives in faith that he will keep his promises on this earth to love and heal and protect and guide his children, even if we don't see it immediately or even in our lifetimes. And this makes me even more thankful for the ways that I can see him being faithful in his love and care for us.

I was blessed with the opportunity to share this encouragement from the Lord with the members of Mito church on May 29th. Below is a short clip from the end of my testimony.

March 11th, 2011

As on most Friday afternoons, I was at my desk in the church office, making the English bulletin for Sunday. Eloise, a church member, had stopped by to go with Hitomi-san, the church secretary, to buy the supplies for the homeless ministry for the next day. One of Hitomi-san's friends from Tomobe church had stopped by to visit after a doctor's appointment in Mito and Atsushi, the minister, had come up from his office on the first floor to chat with everyone for a minute.

And then the building started to shake, which is not altogether unusual, so we all paused for a moment to see how big this earthquake would be . . . maybe a little bigger than any we had recently . . . and then things started to fall from shelves and the photocopier started to shimmy across the floor. I decided maybe the cluttered office, full of rickety bookshelves, was not the best place to be. I noticed that Eloise had gone outside, so I decided to check on her. And the wide-open space of the parking lot seemed an acceptable place to wait for the end of the earthquake in relative safety.

The shaking was continuing to get stronger, as I made my way outside. I was concerned that the way the ground was rippling would make it too difficult for us to stand, so I urged Eloise to kneel with me. On our knees, we prayed together as everything around us shook.

The whole earthquake lasted about 5 mins -- which is long for an earthquake. Afterwards, the others came outside. There were some small aftershocks and a couple of rather large aftershocks that had us all down on our knees again. We listened to the radio in Hitomi-san's car and heard that the epicenter was off the coast of Miyagi, and we heard that there was a tsunami, but there was no way that we could imagine what was really happening. But I started praying for all my friends in Miyagi, and hoping that they were all okay.

There were people from the offices in the area around the church waiting along the street and gathering in parking lots. And I remember a group of men from a nearby newspaper office, who had set up their laptops on a little patch of grass in the parking lot across the street from the church. Every few minutes, one of them would grab a camera and dash off toward the station or the downtown area. From them we overheard that there was some bad damage to some of the businesses in the older buildings downtown. Lots of broken glass.

We tried and tried to get through on our cell phones to friends and family, but were basically unsuccessful. So around 4:30 we decided to try to make our ways home. I had taken the bus that morning, but the buses weren't running after the earthquake, so I walked. Because I was still a little out of shape after gradually building my strength back up since my accident in January, it took me about 2 hours to walk the nearly 4 miles back to my house.

Along the way, I noticed more and more of the damage. There were cracks and holes in the roads and sidewalks. The streets were lined with piles of ceramic roof tiles. Some older houses and buildings had partially collapsed. Most businesses were closed, but the convenience stores were full of people frantically buying anything that was left. And there were crowds of people, who had been left stranded because the buses and trains were not running, walking to pick up their children from school or meet their families at home.

On my way home, I saw that a whole chunk of the sidewalk cracked, had been pushed out and had been flipped over by the earthquake.

I was thankful to get home just as it was getting dark, because when there is no electricity anywhere -- it really gets dark! And upon arriving at my house, I found Gaku and another friend from church sitting in Joel's car in the driveway. (Joel had left for Singapore that morning, so he was actually in an airplane at the time of the earthquake.) In fact, most of the people in our neighborhood were waiting in their cars, listening to the radio and waiting to see if another big aftershock might come.

By then, it was 6:30 and none of us had eaten dinner, so by the light of my cell phone display, I went into the house to find some food. Since it was already pretty dark, all I could really tell was that stuff had fallen down off walls and shelves all over the house -- I couldn't see to tell how bad the damage was, so I just grabbed some stuff from the kitchen and some blankets from my room. The three of us spent the night in the car, trying our best to sleep despite being shaken awake every 5 to 10 mins by the aftershocks.

As you can see, my closet basically exploded, but (you can't see it so well in this picture) nothing fell onto my bed, so if I had been sleeping during the earthquake, I would have been safe.

This is what we saw in our kitchen the next morning.

So we spent the next couple of weeks cleaning the house, and then cleaning the church and helping to clean up the homes of church members, and trying not to be stressed out by the hundreds of aftershocks. And during that time we kept working on finding out whether friends in Sendai were safe, and trying to find a way to get the volunteers who were supposed to leave for a mission trip to Cambodia the following week to the airport in Narita. Then we began the massive undertaking of fielding requests for information and offers for help from overseas, and we were so thankful for those outside of Japan who stepped in to distribute information and answer questions on our behalf.

I know that many foreigners in Japan struggled with whether they should leave the country, and I do not want to pass judgement on those who struggled and those who decided to go. We all had to follow the guidance of the Holy Spirit in a very difficult situation. However, I do want express my appreciation for all of you who trusted that I was following what God wants for my life and my service to him, when I did not even consider leaving. Thank you for not putting pressure on me to return to America. Thank you to those of you who encouraged me as I struggled to heal and recover from the shock of being in a natural disaster. Thank you for covering us in your prayers. Thank you for your support and your understanding. Thank you for your love.